When you think about what separates confidence from arrogance, there can be a fine line between the two. Most people have opinions on what constitutes arrogance from personal experience. We’ve all come across people who we perceive to be arrogant, but where does the distinction come from – is it a matter of opinion?
The truth is that the lines between arrogance and confidence are intertwined and easily blurred. Thinking about this in a leadership context: if these attributes are difficult to define in others, how much harder is it for leaders to recognise in themselves when there is so much more at play? Expectation from colleagues and wider teams, the pressure to ‘prove’ yourself as a capable leader – it can be easy to try too hard to appear confident and end up demonstrating overconfidence or arrogance.
Confidence is absolutely essential for success in a position of leadership, but arrogance is a behaviour that could threaten your effectiveness as a leader. Research from the University of Sussex found that humble leaders actually wield significant influence within their organisations through informal mentoring and building human capital1.
This article explores how to recognise the critical differences between confidence and arrogance and how to manage these behaviours in the context of your leadership role.
When Arrogance Masquerades as Confidence
As a leader, your time is often consumed thinking about the behaviours and actions of your team. Revisiting or auditing your own behaviours is not something you tend to do regularly, unless something is highlighted and there’s a reason to question it.
There’s a certain amount of assertiveness you need to possess in leadership. Your team looks to you not just for specific guidance but to be the reliable figurehead to provide consistency and stability. But this ‘fake it till you make it’ approach can often have the opposite effect on your team.
Common Scenarios Where Confidence Crosses the Line
The following are common behaviours that leaders demonstrate when trying to double down in an effort to appear confident in their own decisions:
Dismissing alternative perspectives. Believing that your opinion is the ‘right’ one, without listening to all members of the team or stakeholders in order to make a fast decision to progress a project. Research indicates that arrogant leaders display contempt towards the advice and criticism of others2.
Avoiding vulnerability. Reluctance to admit when you’re not 100% sure of which direction to take something, or even attempting to cover up when things aren’t going right. This damages team trust and psychological safety.
Discounting others’ expertise. The inability to take on board opinions from employees with less experience than you. However, confident leaders recognise that valuable insights can come from any level within the organisation.
No leader gets it right 100% of the time. It can be tempting to try and overcompensate as a leader when you feel slightly out of your depth, but this is inadvisable.
Building Genuine Self-Belief
You will have been appointed to your leadership role as a result of your expertise in your field. Naturally, you’ll have a certain amount of self-belief in your technical skills and abilities, but what about the people skills needed to do your job as a leader? How confident do you feel in them?
It probably won’t surprise you that a certain proportion of leaders and senior leaders experience imposter syndrome or a lack of confidence in their own aptitude as a leader. Even if those around you have confidence in your abilities, this doesn’t always translate into your own psyche.
To increase your self-confidence, it’s not about taking on more work or striving for better results to ‘prove’ yourself. Instead, look to regularly self-reflect on your own leadership skills and competencies.
Strategies for Increasing Self-Confidence
Regular self-assessment. Increasing self-belief is achieved by reflection, having honest self-assessments about your current strengths and weaknesses, and demonstrating the ability to work on things about yourself that you want to improve.
Seeking constructive feedback. You can also ask your close team and your own management for leadership areas they think you could work on. Studies show that 71% of employers value emotional intelligence more than technical skills when evaluating candidates3.
Acknowledging growth areas. Confident leaders recognise their limitations and work hard to improve. In contrast, arrogant individuals refuse to acknowledge that they have weaknesses or make mistakes, which can be harmful to organisational agility.
The key is developing genuine confidence based on real capabilities and honest self-awareness rather than the false confidence that comes from ignoring your limitations.
Practising Humility and Honesty With Your Team
As a leader, one of the most difficult challenges can be when your team is looking to you for guidance and you can’t give them the answers they’re looking for. This could be either due to not wanting to share negative news or updates, not being certain on the outcomes or decisions you and the wider management team are making, or due to a straightforward gap in your own knowledge.
The Power of Authentic Leadership
Your team will always react better to honesty than you might think. If you don’t have the update, answer, skills, or knowledge they’re looking for, being honest about this is always the best course of action.
Admitting knowledge gaps. No-one is going to benefit from you pretending to have all the answers. Be ready to admit when there’s a skill or knowledge gap in your own skillset and be honest with your team about this.
Building trust through vulnerability. Despite what you might think, admitting your weaknesses is a way to develop your own confidence. It makes you human and increases your potential to learn. This authentic approach builds trust and creates a culture where team members feel safe to admit their own challenges.
Creating collaborative solutions. When you’re uncertain, involve your team in finding solutions. This not only generates better outcomes but also develops their problem-solving capabilities and increases engagement.
Research from the London School of Economics found that humble leaders engage in behaviours that develop others naturally and, through this informal mentoring, build human capital and gain prestige, respect, and prominence1.
Maintaining the Balance
Often, arrogance comes from overcompensation – when leaders who don’t feel totally in control of a situation look to mask this with supposedly confident behaviours.
Increasing and maintaining confidence in your leadership skills without this tipping over into arrogance is something you must be aware of throughout your leadership journey.
Practical Steps for Self-Awareness
Regular leadership style review. No matter how long you’ve been in your leadership role, regularly revisit your leadership style. Consider how your approach impacts others and whether it aligns with your values and the organisation’s culture.
Monitor your tone and content. Be aware of the tone and content of your interactions. Ask yourself: Am I listening more than I’m speaking? Am I genuinely considering others’ perspectives? Am I open to being wrong?
Seek continuous feedback. Actively seek feedback from your direct reports and other colleagues in order to maintain mutual respect and strengthen your working relationships with your team. Create regular opportunities for honest dialogue about your leadership approach.
Develop emotional intelligence. Focus on developing self-awareness, self-regulation, and social skills. Studies indicate that the demand for emotional intelligence skills is likely to grow by six times in the next 3-5 years3.
Warning Signs to Watch For
If you notice any of these patterns in yourself, it may be time to reassess your approach:
- Team members becoming less willing to share ideas or challenge your views
- Reduced engagement in meetings where you’re present
- Colleagues seeming reluctant to bring you problems or bad news
- Finding yourself speaking more than listening in team discussions
- Feeling defensive when receiving feedback
- Dismissing ideas quickly without full consideration
These signals suggest your confidence may be crossing into arrogance and impacting your team’s psychological safety and willingness to contribute.
Self-Assessment Questions
To gauge where you stand on the confidence-arrogance spectrum, regularly ask yourself:
- When was the last time I admitted I didn’t know something?
- Do I celebrate my team’s successes as enthusiastically as my own?
- Am I open to being proven wrong, or do I defend my position regardless?
- Do I seek diverse perspectives before making decisions?
- How do I react when someone junior offers a different viewpoint?
- Am I comfortable acknowledging my mistakes to my team?
Your honest answers to these questions will reveal whether you’re leading with genuine confidence or whether arrogance is creeping into your leadership style.
Frequently Asked Questions About When Confidence Turns to Arrogance
The Path to Authentic Leadership
Often, arrogance comes from overcompensation – when leaders who don’t feel totally in control of a situation look to mask this with supposedly confident behaviours. The research is clear: humble, confident leaders who are willing to learn, admit weaknesses, and develop others are the most successful in the long term.
Increasing and maintaining confidence in your leadership skills without this tipping over into arrogance requires ongoing awareness and commitment. By regularly revisiting your leadership style, being aware of how you interact with others, and actively seeking feedback, you can build the kind of confidence that inspires teams and drives organisational success.
The journey from good to great leadership isn’t about having all the answers. It’s about having the confidence to ask the right questions, the humility to learn from others, and the self-awareness to keep growing throughout your career.
Remember that genuine confidence doesn’t require you to be perfect or all-knowing. It comes from being secure enough in yourself to be vulnerable, honest about your limitations, and genuinely invested in developing those around you. When you lead this way, your team will follow not because they fear you, but because they trust and respect you.